When Chronic Pain Becomes Too Much: How to Break the Boom-and-Bust Cycle
You’ve probably heard it before: “Just listen to your body.”
But what if your body gives mixed messages?
One day, you’re finally feeling up to tackling the to-do list—and the next, you’re sidelined by a flare that wipes you out for days. You push through because you have to… until you can’t anymore.
This up-and-down pattern has a name: the boom-and-bust cycle. And while it’s common among people living with chronic pain, it’s also a cycle that’s totally treatable.
To be clear: getting into the boom-bust cycle is not something anyone chooses. You’ve been doing your best with the tools you have. But when those tools stop working–or start making things worse–it’s time for something different.
In this post, you’ll learn why chronic pain sometimes feels unmanageable, what you can do when things get overwhelming, and how to start pacing in a way that actually works (spoiler: no willpower marathons required).
What Is the Boom-and-Bust Cycle in Chronic Pain?
The boom-and-bust cycle happens when you push yourself to do as much as possible on a “good” day… only to crash afterward and need extra recovery time. On those “recovery” days, you might feel like you're back at square one, both physically and mentally.
This pattern can lead to more pain, more fatigue, and more frustration. And while it might seem like a motivation problem, it’s actually about how your nervous system is handling stress and activity.
Let’s say you wake up feeling better than usual—a rare good day. You decide to catch up on everything: laundry, groceries, emails, maybe even a workout. You’re proud of how much you get done.
But by that evening? You’re wiped.
And the next day? You’re in a full-on pain flare and can barely move.
You wonder, “Did I overdo it? Or is this just how my body is now?”
This is the classic boom-and-bust cycle in action—doing a lot while your body’s cooperating, then paying for it later. It’s not a sign of weakness. It’s your nervous system trying (poorly) to protect you.
Why doesn’t the boom-and-bust cycle work?
Think of it like burning through your phone battery by 10 a.m. every day—no matter how many apps you close, you’re still running on empty.
Signs That Your Chronic Pain Is Becoming Too Much:
Red Flags to Watch For
If your pain has started interfering with your daily life more than usual, it’s probably time to make a change.
Here are a some red flags that your current boom-and-bust approach might not be working anymore:
You’re crashing hard after high-output days
Your energy feels unpredictable or fragile
Pain is making it harder to work, care for others, or enjoy the things you love
You’re starting to lose trust in your body’s signals (or second-guess what’s real)
You’ve followed the treatment plan, but your symptoms are just as disruptive
You’re managing—but barely—and recovery takes longer than it used to
You’ve stopped mentioning how bad it really is—because what’s the point?
You find yourself mentally calculating if a task is “worth it” because of the pain it might cause
You’re spending more time researching solutions than actually living your life
If any of this sounds familiar…
It doesn’t mean you’re doing a bad job or that you’ve failed—it just means your body is asking for a different kind of rhythm.
How to Manage Chronic Pain When It Feels Unbearable
Step 1: Know That It’s Not “All in Your Head”
Yes, pain is affected by the brain. But that doesn’t mean you’re imagining it. According to Cleveland Clinic, chronic pain often rewires how the brain and nerves communicate. That’s why it can stick around long after an injury has healed.
Step 2: Build in Recovery—Before You Hit the Wall
Pacing isn’t about doing less. It’s about spreading your energy in a way that helps you stay consistent. Think: walking one block daily instead of running three on a “good” day and needing the next two to recover.
Here’s an example: let’s say you’ve got back-to-back meetings at work, and you're determined to push through. You sit too long, you skip lunch, you multitask during meetings… essentially, you ignore the warning signs. You tell yourself, “I’ll rest later.”
“Later” turns into two full days on the couch, missing out on plans, and wondering why “normal” things seem to knock you out.
It’s not about being lazy or fragile—it’s about your system running on fumes. And no amount of willpower refuels a tank that’s already empty.
Step 3: Make a Flare-Up Plan
Prepare for pain spikes like you’d prep for a rainy day, such as:
Have heat/ice ready
Keep simple meals or snacks on hand
Plan easy activities that feel comforting
Practice grounding or mindfulness exercises
Step 4: Use Your Words (and Ask for Help)
You’re not weak for needing support. Whether it’s a pain-informed therapist, a doctor who gets it, or a low-stakes class like Empowered Relief™, finding the right kind of help can take some pressure off your nervous system—and your heart.
Step 5: Try a Nervous System Reset
Relaxation doesn’t have to mean bubble baths (though hey, go for it). It means learning tools to calm your fight-or-flight response. That might include:
Breathwork
Guided body scans
Soothing touch + compassionate self-talk
Short periods of rest without distraction (or multitasking)
These steps aren’t about doing everything perfectly—they’re about giving your body the conditions it needs to recover, reset, and build resilience over time. Even small changes in how you pace, rest, or ask for help can interrupt the boom-and-bust cycle and move you toward more stability—and more ease.
Chronic Pain Support That Actually Helps
There’s no one-size-fits-all solution to chronic pain—but the right kind of support can help you regain control, reduce stress, and rebuild trust in your body.
At Alcove Mental Health, we specialize in helping people manage chronic pain, fatigue, and the emotional crash that often comes with it. We focus on practical, science-backed strategies that meet you where you are—without pressure, fluff, or weeks of talking before we get to the tools.
That means:
Therapy that respects your time and capacity
Tools from CBT, ACT, and somatic practices
Virtual sessions you can access from wherever you feel most comfortable (lap animals welcome)
FAQs About Chronic Pain
-
It often means your body and nervous system are in a state of overwhelm. That might include pain flare-ups, brain fog, poor sleep, or emotional exhaustion. It’s a sign to slow down, not push harder.
-
Try pacing, gentle movement, relaxation exercises, and reducing stress. Make a flare-up plan ahead of time so you’re not scrambling when you’re already in pain.
-
Absolutely. Chronic pain can increase the risk of depression, anxiety, and isolation. Integrating mental health care into your treatment can make a big difference.
-
Yes. Feeling like your body is working against you is common—but therapy can help you shift that relationship over time.
FAQs about Alcove Mental Health & Online Therapy for Chronic Pain
-
We offer integrative care using CBT for chronic pain, ACT, somatic techniques, and pain neuroscience education. You’ll also have access to Empowered Relief™, a one-session skills class. Learn more about our services here.
-
Yes! We’re a 100% telehealth practice. If you live in a PSYPACT participating state, we can work together through secure video sessions. Check if we serve your state here.
-
We specialize in working with people who are tired but high-functioning—folks who’ve pushed through for years and are ready for a new approach that’s both grounded and kind. Learn more about our mind-body approach here.
-
Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to explore fit. We’ll talk about what you’re looking for and whether Alcove is the right space for you.
If you’re curious to learn more about what our process is like, visit our Getting Started page.
Ready to Break the Cycle?
You don’t have to wait for a full crash to get support. And if you’ve already had one (or several), that doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong. Whether your pain is new, flaring, or just too much right now—you’re not alone.
There’s another way to live with this, and you don’t have to figure it out by yourself.
Let’s build a new rhythm together.
Your nervous system isn’t broken—it just needs a new rhythm to follow.
Whether you’re burned out from trying “everything” or just starting to explore what’s possible — I’m glad you landed here.
Related Posts
